Tell A Story Like Bobby Axlerod
The more specific or visual you can be, the more persuasive your argument. The more interesting your story. No one likes boring generalities.
Why?
Specifics stick in your mind like Scotch Super Glue™.
Here’s an example from Showtime’s Billions.
Bobby Axlerod is asked to think of a time when he used his anger as weapon.
Fifth grade.
I needed money.
There were these rich eighth-grade pricks from Harrison.
God, I hated their stupid faces.
I had an Islander jersey and a Koho hockey stick.
I signed ’em Mike Bossy and Bryan Trottier, and the dickbags bought ’em.
What’d you get? $300 cash, new sneakers, Atari.
When they found out, they went to town on me like Dave “The Hammer” Schultz.
God, I got so angry at them, my parents for not having enough money, myself for getting caught.
That rage grew in me.
It worked like jet fuel for years.
This is an incident from over 40 years ago, but there’s nothing fuzzy in this memory — for him, or the listener.
How To Make Sure You Buy The Right Book
This is what my Amazon wish list looks like.
Here’s how to buy books that you won’t regret.
• Firstly. A book is a fantastic investment. So, when in doubt, buy. If a book contains one valuable thought, I believe that’s worth $5 or whatever it costs.
• If a book sounds interesting, I add it to the wish list. I check the list periodically. If the book no longer appeals to me, I’ll remove it. If I really want to read it, I move to cart and buy it. Sometimes I’ll add, remove, add a title a few times. I use time as a filter. Eg. The Edward Bernays and Ronald Reagan books have been in this list for a long time. I know they will be worth reading, but I’m not that excited about it, so I haven’t bought them yet.
I buy a book two ways. 1. I really want to read it. 2. I really think I should read it, meaning that it has stuck around in my wishlist for a long time.
Most books will move through this funnel. Occasionally I’ll impulse buy, in which case the book will skip the first 2 steps.
My wishlist also reflects the themes that I’m interested in at the moment:
Psychology bucket: Behave, Elephant, Sapiens.
Marketing bucket: Tested Advertising, Scientific Advertising, Words that work and Crystallizing Public Opinion.
People: Surely you’re joking, Impro, Exit West, Notes,
Work: Radical Candor
Fat+Muscle+Bone
In the health/fitness industry, we spend most of our time talking about a few things. FAT and WEIGHT.
We want to “lose” both of those things. They are bad.
We want to find out our body FAT % and lower that to.
But it’s not all about losing things.
We want to get muscle.
We want to get a six pack.
We want to get toned.
It’s normal to think like this. This is how the industry talks to us. This is how have been trained to talk about fitness. This is how our friends talk. We hear it on TV. Especially late at night.
But there’s a healthier way to think about your weight.
It’s something that most people don’t know about. And even after reading this article, most people won’t take the time or spend the money. So, if you can’t be bothered, STOP READING.
Ok, for the rest of you, I’m talking of course, about a DEXA Scan.
Google it.
It takes 5 minutes, costs $50 and will change how you think about your body, and how you approach your fitness goals.
After your scan, you will be handed a report.
The report has a lot of numbers, but the most important thing to look at is this equation:
Lean Tissue + Fat Tissue + Bone = Total Mass
Sounds simple, but this was mind blowing for me.
We are all just big blobs of tissue and bone.
Total mass? That’s what you see on the scale.
That’s what you get frustrated with when it stays the same number, even after eating bloody meal prepped meals and working out at the gym.
That’s the number that goes up after a weekend, or snacking late at night.
That’s the number you pledge to change - after Thanksgiving…. and Christmas.
That’s the number that people HATE or think is UNFAIR.
It’s not any of those things. It’s just….
Muscle + Fat + Bone.
Ok. Breathe out. Relax.
Now. What do we do with those numbers?
First, understand that it’s impossible to make them do what you want. You can’t edit them on a computer and magically update your body.
They are lagging indicators. All we can really do is try and nudge them in the right direction.
If you’ve ever seriously changed how you eat, you’ll notice you feel many other positive things (better energy, sleep, mood, mental acuity) before you see the scale move in a significant way.
The basic idea is you want to make that FAT number go down and the MUSCLE one go up.
Once you understand the FAT and the MUSCLE and the BONE is all stuck together, it’s kind of obvious that “torching fat” or “packing on lean muscle” is a ridiculous concept. Whatever your goal, they both come along for the ride.
You can be smart, and slowly lose fat while keeping most your muscle, but you are going to lose muscle. And conversely, if you want to get stronger, you will be adding on fat.
So before your start “torching fat from your belly” or “getting a six pack”, take a scan. Study the numbers. And then get to work.
Here’s a few labs where I’ve received scans. They all use the same machine, Look for deals, you can usually get a scan for half price.
K8 BodyScan - Melbourne, Australia
DexaFit - San Francisco, California
University Orthopaedic Associates - Somerset, New Jersey
Talent Stack
https://static.nytimes.com/email-content/SL_7648.html?nlid=67438024
What’s the problem?
If your identity is tied up in a singular skill, eg. writing, especially if it is considered ‘creative’ by society, there’s a high chance you will get stressed at improving, or generating lots of good work.
Writing is what you must do. And you must do it well. Out of ideas. You’re done.
By putting all your eggs in the ‘writing’ basket, you’ve become more fragile, and exposed to much more risk.
Do this:
Spread yourself over 6-7 areas of interest/skills and you will always be eager to spend time in 1 or 2.
Ok, sounds good. What do I do next?
In terms of picking the skills, I like a need-based approach. For example, if you are working on a project that needs some decent photographs, start learning the basics, and see if you can get a ‘good enough’ result.
If a project, or better - a deadline demands it, you will learn what you need. You will be much more effective with your time than if you are doing something “because you think it’s worthwhile, or will make me money.”
Allow yourself to be steered into ‘strategic procrastination’.
Can’t bear to pick up your camera and take photos? Start drawing.
Can’t bear to put pen to paper? Start experimenting with a camera.
And then what happens?
By stretching your net over many different skills, it’s likely your creative reservoir and motivation around your primary skill will quickly fill up with new ideas, connections and inspiration.
Less burnout. More fun.
And…?
I bet without even realizing, you will be rushing back to your notepad/easel filled with energy and ideas.
How To Be Better At Talking
I’m not the best talker.
I’ll admit it.
And if you ever talk to me, you’ll see what I mean.
When I talk, I’m often thinking out loud. This helps me, and annoys or worse bores the listener.
I struggle to cut to the point.
I can be funny, I can make people laugh. But it’s never after a punchline.
I can tell a story, but it can get easily derailed, or lose the plot.
I’m not even very good at arguing, something that seems to be innate to all Americans. I flip flop, and start sweating if I’m forced to prove my point.
Anyway, this is all to say, that I could benefit from some help.
The other day, I stumbled on a quick fix, that you might find helpful.
Because, we could all be better talkers.
It’s not something they teach in school. And for those of us who would struggle to put together a captivating public speech, remember, it’s not your fault. I think it’s something you can learn.
Here’s what I did.
The other night, I was riding home from work, and I wanted to reply to a message.
I should have waited until I was off the bike, but instead, I dictated and sent an audio message.
I thought about what I wanted to say, said it and saved it. Before you send audio messages, you can play them back to yourself.
We all know it sounds strange when you listen to yourself, so you’ll need to grit your teeth. But what happens next is really interesting.
You start to think.
Could I have said that better? Could I have spoken more clearly? Did my point come across? Do you smile or laugh listening to the story? Can you place yourself in the listeners shoes? Do you think they’d receive the message loud and clear.
Not only does recording yourself clean up your voice, it can also aid your writing.
Think about a tricky writing assignment. Asking someone out on a date. Asking for money. Most of us will toil over a few sentences, writing and rewriting. When you’re forced to say what you need to say with the red recording icon blinking in your face, you’ll get straight to the point. It may not be perfect the first run, but very quickly you’ll sound natural, normal and even persuasive, simply because you are using your own voice.
So, try it.
Send some short audio messages instead of typing, and you’ll not only be better at talking, you’ll be better to listen to!
And of course, I should I have read this post instead of typing it!
The reason to diet
I think you should go on a diet. Even if it’s likely you’ll fail, feel bad, and give up.
Dieting is still a popular and effective way to lose weight. Lots of people have tried different styles of eating, and have successfully reached their goals.
Some people say that dieting is dangerous, is the wrong way to think about food, and ultimately fails because life gets in the way.
You don’t need to read all those books in the airport about willpower to understand this concept. Even as I’m writing this, I’m chomping on a chocalate bar and am eyeing even more sugary treats — Halloween is my excuse!
I know better, yet I still drift off my plan.
But here’s one reason I think diets are a good idea, even if just for a week.
They force you to look at food, and fitness in a new way. When you approach a new diet, like paleo, you invariably tend to soak in some information. You learn stuff. Paleo might lead you to articles about Crossfit, or FODMAP, or any number of things.
I always keep an eye out for the latest crazes. For example, the vertical diet has been doing the rounds in the bodybuilding community.
Am I going to eat like this for the rest of my life. Is this going to make me shredded and rich? NO!
I think that anyone approaching a new diet has to have a bit of growth mindset. They have to believe that they are able to change something about themselves. This is what seperates them from the others who stay on the sidelines and are fine with not trying anything new.
So when I hear about someone who is trying something new, instead of shaking my head and saying “You know must people fail….or you know there’s no science to back up what you’re saying…or you know that’s not going to give you a six-pack, I keep my mouth shut.
The health and fitness world is a bit mad, but I think we can all benefit from experimenting, going after lofty goals and trying new stuff.